I'm standing on my vacation

Literally I am standing on my vacation. I had visions of far away places, palm trees, exotic travels in distant lands. Then reality came to roost and like a typical adult it came down to new floors or a vacation. My inner child screamed vacation vacation..... however my trampled carpet that has seen better days screamed for replacement. So this is how I came to literally stand on my vacation. However very typical lemons have come to me and I am making lemonade. Although some would argue that a new floor isn't lemons...... I have a lovely home I am grateful for everyday, again the inner child screams exotic adventures. I thought about this standing thing often, almost daily for 2 weeks. I day dreamed of winning the lottery and having both. I thought about those trade offs we all make everyday, the compromises of life. I laughed and thought about my economics professor in graduate school discussing opportunity costs and how neat and tidy everything looks on paper.... although living with it can be a challenge. I also realized that with Sam's up coming travel schedule for work family vacation or a dreamed of getaway for me was not going to be easy to schedule. I am happy to have a new floor even if it means standing on my vacation.

Back to that lemonade..... I decided last summer between reeling from two international moves in 8 months and summer temperatures soaring in the 100's for 59 days..... and the lack of household goods... a new house and an unstable child..... summer didn't exist...we ran through the fall.... gasped at winter and only now as spring emerges are we finally clearing the fog to see where we live. This is when I realized I was standing on my vacation in more than one way..... It was a subtle seduction really Sam & I had dinner out with friends and saw a new side of the city, We had company come and we explored some places we had heard about...... I had read about these legendary "stay cations" in family magazines and finally a family member said " Is your blog about your city ? Do you want to tell others about Texas? " At the time the idea seemed strange, I mean after all I wasn't sure I was Texas material or that I could really call myself a Texan. Back to my previous blog post of writing my name in the land.... could I call Texas home ? I have explored other parts of Texas in my life, yet it was long ago and far away and not the thing I felt a passion for. Some days I feel like I could be happy here I could write my name in the land a put down roots. I could someday after time call myself a Texan. I have come to see a glimmer of a life, I have made a few friends and staved off the lonely hamster wheel I feel I am on. Of course there are days my gypsy heart screams to be wild and run amuck across the globe. I nearly cried at the thought of never straying from these borders, my passport collecting dust. I could belong to one place or one state my heart is to big for just one place. After waffling in true piscian style I again thought of those lemons, I am standing on my vacation.

Spring is coming and while I am unsure of vacations, Texas and my own ability to remain sane in one spot... I am absolutely sure about one thing. I can't live another Summer trapped in nothing. I am a planner by nature and explorer in spirit, I need adventure and new things, I need to learn. I want the kids to have the best of the word we live in no matter how temporary or permanent that is. I have always gotten out and explored where we live ...even if it meant we had months or a year. Texas should not be the exception. I want to make sure I keep idle hands busy for the summer, I maintain my sanity and that we live. I have planned spring break activities, I have planned summer things and I have made a list of things we missed, things we have been meaning to get to, and things we want to see. This year is the time to do it. We will conquer the list, we will explore San Antonio, and Texas. I am standing on my "vacation". Lemons will be converted to lemonade while I will not be off to Morocco, Japan, the Caribbean, Egypt or Greece... I will see Big Bend National Park.

The kids and I will go and explore all of the must see things here in San Antonio, we will see the things in the area people whisper about and we will become Texans while in Texas. In September my friends came for a visit, they are family to me and they suggested we go to the Japanese tea garden. I had been dying to see this I had heard of it's beauty I just hadn't ventured out. I spent a blissful rainy day in these gardens and can't wait to go back. Most of our outing together no matter the country involve rain and trust me these two people make being in the rain fun. The gardens were beautiful and full of local and exotic plants, the stairs the buildings the sculptures and ever=n the waterfall was amazing. I can't wait to go back and I hope those of you coming to the city will make time to walk through these gardens. They are free and have recently been renovated. In the middle of the city there is this beautiful oasis full of hidden treasures.