People

Brace yourselves for a long post. I have been composing this post in my mind for 4 days I have a bit of writer's block. I always say I am going to be in bed by 9 and here it is 9:30 already. I have even started this post and deleted 3 times in the last 3 days. The first post I felt was too negative... a filter with which I am stuck with at the moment so sadly. then I wanted to write my thoughts but condense them and not sound like I was "preaching". It is odd in the first place that I am agonizing over this post as I love people they are my passion you can say. All the jobs I have ever held or dreamed of holding have revolved around people and helping or interacting with them. I am social by nature. I for better or worse am defined by my relationships with people. I have been talking with friends and family for the last few weeks just normal conversations, I have to admit though 2 of my friends have thrown me loops. One friend is embroiled in a silly fight with her sister and her 2 brother's..... at times I wish my brother was still here I wouldn't be fighting with him.. I miss one of my best friends. I sound like I am judging I adore my friend she just gets a bit self centered at times and she is "in the wrong" I love her and I am there for her and it isn't anything dramatic. We all have our own relationships to sort out. People can be inspiring in strange ways I was reading an article about the POLICE the singing group and how over time they have learned to work through their differences. I admire anyone who works through any difficult relationship to make it work whether it is professional or personal. We are adults and could walk away and say I don't have to deal with this. I respect the effort that people put into facing challenges. We as humans seek to be with people surround ourselves with them and yet oddly we spend a lot of time escaping each other too. I am an optimist by nature and this move has crushed some of my faith in people...... which is why sadly I feel depleted and negative at the moment. I know it won't last forever I know it is the murkiness of change and this challenging move. When things go awry I reach out to others to gain strength and hope. I have chatted with friends and family and happily I am blessed to have many of both.... with all the quirks and oddities that go along. Yet I tend to be a "take the bull by it's horns" kinda gal and when I feel as though change is not going well I seek to change that.  Self doubt is running rampant here which is why I think I am struggling to write about how inspiring people can be and how wonderful it is to have friends and family. I am in the middle of these observations of the positive and the negatives of people and in a day a thousand moments of both are playing out right here. I encourage all of you this week to work at some relationship that may frustrate you either at work or at home and try hard to make it work on some level..... I know I am working on patience to understand the people handling my paperwork..... mishandling would be a better word. I am going to appreciate the wonderful relationships I have a little more this week to. thank you to those of you who are positive and love me.  Yes I know this post is odd and not pretty or witty and even a bit disorganized.... but like anyone else I am working through it all this week; sometimes getting to the good stuff is more of a process than we ever imagined. I promise the sun will come out tomorrow !