Girls.... Boys .. and the 1st Grade

I have to say there has been a buzz lately with my fellow Mom's of 6 year olds. The boy's mothers are mentioning brazen girls who approach their boys. The girl's mothers are worried about the messages their girls are receiving..... and in general there is a bit of concern over crushes and where things could head.

I knew the day would come, I figured I could handle it that I would be cool calm and collected ( and thwart any unsuitable girls with a good stare down).......I seemed pretty safe I mean most boys think girls have cooties until what like 9th grade........ ok a bit optimistic.... 7th grade. Well knowing the buzz, I decided to casually ask H about girls in his class. I was especially interested because he mentions a few girls a lot, and his 3 year old brother told me he had a girlfriend. Once I got past the ego dent of the 3 year old brother knowing something before me, I mean after all I have been the one H has come to talk to for 6 years...... I decided to go on a fact finding mission. I have to be careful not to be to obvious however or I may loose any chance I have later.

The first conversation thankfully was along the lines of " Mom I have lots of friends that are girls" and then I just listened as that certain girls name came up a lot.

The second conversation I felt pretty safe that she was friend and it was a good friendship. Her name was "fast Jessica" Now I know your alarm bells are going up also a girl with the nickname fast.... this is 1st grade here people. I learned she earned the nickname because she runs the fastest in the races at gym class, she reads the fastest in the class, and she is unstoppable in tag. This sounded like a typical friendship for first grade. I was VERY pleased to know she is one of the smartest girls in the class, she is quiet and polite and well mannered and shy ... and her Mother is very nice and has rules. This was shaping up to be perfect, H is shy and he loves reading and tag and races..... I could see why they spent recess playing tag. Phew all very innocent.

I have spoken with Jessica many times and she is adorable..... quiet with a wonderful smile, and she usually encourages my son to make good choices, during class time. H assured me several times she was just a friend......

Now I know I will regret this next "story" I was 6 the first time I kissed a boy..... oh yes.....
He was older a whole 7 1/2 and he lived next door... and he kissed me first.... after I won a race to the top of the "dirt pile" on our street. I was the fastest kid in our neighborhood at the time for hill racing.... ( it was a dirt pile from a bulldozer about 6 feet tall) He had a 16 year old sister who did unspeakable things with her boyfriend in his car in their driveway..... much to the horror of the mothers on our street. Now that I am a Mother I can totally see why. The thought of H kissing a girl, well it just can't be so.....

Today however the tide turned...... he is interested in a girl.... I think it is safe to say he has no clue about kissing ( please let this be true)... although lately he is squirmy and the mention of the word kiss ( this could spell trouble) We were driving home from school and H asked me if I ever ate an ant. I of course said no but in some parts of the world they cover them in chocolate or fry them.... and of course if he should go to these places he should give it a try and send me a postcard. Well this opened the door to why he wanted to know........
Apparently to attract the attention of my son you need to eat bugs.
" Mom Jessica is the coolest girl ever, she ate and ant in front of everyone on the playground, it was amazing." " Jessica is very pretty Mom she has blue eyes like I do"........ ( trying not to die of a heart attack and swerve in traffic) I calmly asked why this girl ate an ant....... ( H loves bugs like most boys) Well apparently she likes bugs to and she wanted to prove she wasn't afraid of bugs, so she ate an ant. Yes, as I mentioned above this is one of the smartest girls in the class.
Now many thoughts raced in my head...... this is a tough girl, I like that, a little bit of fearless is good for any girl. Then I thought, I wonder if she realizes what she has done......
Then I thought, why would my son find bug eating attractive in a girl ?
H is 6 he loves books, running, bugs..... and people a bit unconventional.... he gravitates to the shy because he is shy; yet he manages to make them all come out of their shells. This girl fits his 6 year old requirements...... and mine. J is smart, well mannered, well behaved and shy..... I guess a Mom has to overlook bug eating........

I have to say I so hope there is no kissing..... that it stays tag on the play ground..... for a few more days I can pretend that H is a little kid. Of course I want him to grow up, forge new paths, make his own choices...... I can only hope that he will have the same good sense about girls he has now. When he is older .... she will be smart, and well mannered, and somewhat shy like him...... and of course a love of bugs would be fine too.

So while I don't like the thought of H kissing a girl..... I think I like that he is thinking about his choices and looking in the right direction. For now I would like it to stay as a game of tag on the playground and a reading race in class......please.